Nasty Canasta • The Girl With The 44DD Brain

It's going to be one hell of a week ...

2012-03-05T14:19:00.007-05:00

Wednesday, March 7th at 10pm
NURSE BETTIE BURLESQUE: "The Showgirl Cure For What Ails You"
at Nurse Bettie - 106 Norfolk St., NYC
No cover!

Come and "take a turn for the Nurse" with host Shelly 'The Singing Siren' Watson at this all-new weekly revue featuring some of New York City's biggest names in burlesque! The show is FREE, with gorgeous Go-Go gals shimmying and shaking at 9:45 and the show popping off at 10 pm!

The inaugural lineup features Nasty Canasta, Creamy Stevens, The Maine Attraction and the out-of-this-world Harvest Moon

••••••

Thursday, March 8th at 9pm
CORRUPTION AT TAMMANY HALL
at Tammany Hall - 152 Orchard St., NYC
$10

“CORRUPTION AT TAMMANY HALL”
A New Burlesque Scandal on the Lower East Side!
LIVE EVERY THURSDAY NIGHT
Sponsored by SAILOR JERRY.
Produced by co-conspirators APATHY ANGEL & DJ CEREMONY.

Resident MC “The Great Deceiver” ALBERT CADABRA brings his notorious brand of twisted magic, risqué audience exploitation games, sideshow acts, and stage illusions to the stage for every show.

Join us every Thursday night for burlesque, salacious film, magic, music, and mayhem at Tammany Hall! The raucous weekly show features performances by an ever-changing cast of New York City’s most innovative & outrageous neo-burlesque and sideshow artists. “Corruption At Tammany Hall” culls its moniker from Gilded Age New York City and its nefarious politics and counterculture… bringing a scandalous and unforgettable experience to the Lower East Side each and every week. Every show is followed by a late-night dance party and post-show revelry at Tammany Hall's intimate lower-level lounge.

Performances by:
"Original Cynner" — MARY CYN
"The Girl With The 44DD Brain" — NASTY CANASTA
"Serpentine Seductress" — NIKKI LE VILLAIN
Incredible Contortionist — TOPHER BOUSQUET
-and- "The Girl With The Silver Lining" — APATHY ANGEL
Plus: gorgeous go-go/kitten: STELLA CHUU.

SAILOR JERRY giveaways during the show!
Sailor Jerry Rum open bar: 8:30—9:00... -AND- 11:00—Midnight.

• Come early for a front row table! Kitchen serving until 2 a.m.

Music and post-show (Retro, 80s Dance, Indie, Britpop) dance-party downstairs by DJ CEREMONY: 10:30—4 a.m.

•••••

Friday, March 9th at 7pm
NAKED GIRLS READING FAIRY TALES
at Everleigh Social Club - Chicago, IL

Come celebrate with the girls who started it all! Three years ago, a bevy of beautiful ladies decided to doff their decorative clothing and read before live audiences in the complete nude. Now there are chapters in 14 international cities. They’ve been seen in the international press from Brazil to Turkey, France to Canada, Australia to Los Angeles.

AND you can help us celebrate our third birthday the only way we know how – IN OUR BIRTHDAY SUITS!

Join the Chicago cast of Naked Girls Reading for “Fairy Tails” – a night of legends and make believe that will sure to leave you panting like the Big Bad Wolf.

We'll also be skyping in Nasty Canasta from NYC, Polly Wood from Seattle, and Sophie St. Villier from London to celebrate!!!!
This event is NOT to be missed.

Reservations required.
www.nakedgirlsreading.com

•••••

Saturday, March 10th at 10pm
CAPTAIN REYNOLDS' RISQUE REVIEW: An Evening of Firefly Burlesque
at Nuyorican Poets Cafe - 236 E. 3rd St., NYC
Tickets are $15 at the door, $12 in advance

First there was Firefly. Then there was Serenity. Now there's nudity!

The minds that brought you Original Cyn and Epic Win Burlesque have banded together to create an evening of nerdy nudity based on everyone's favorite sci-fi western, Firefly. And now you can relive your favorite moments and watch your fan fic come to life with scintillating performances by...

NASTY CANASTA: graceful as a leaf on the wind
STORMY LEATHER: she'll put you in the special hell.
APATHY ANGEL: she can kill you with her brain.
MINNIE DIMOOCHA: the reason you'll be in your bunk.
STELLA CHUU: the hero of Canton,
and
MISS MARY CYN: no power in the 'verse can stop her.

Hosted by the honorable Shepherd BURKE HEFFNER.

Get ready for a sexy show by some shiny ladies. Have some drinks, win some stuff and aim to misbehave.

•••••

Saturday, March 10 at 11:30pm
DOC WASABASSCO'S BURLESQUE
at City Winery - 155 Varick St., NYC
$15

Doc Wasabassco invites you to witness the art of burlesque as it's meant to be seen:
the biggest burlesque show in New York featuring our best, brightest, sexiest, and most innovative performers taking to the stage in a beautiful and elegant space worthy of their talents, and your attendance.

Starring Wasabssco's Performer Of the Month, Evelyn Vinyl. With Amber Ray, Go-Go Harder, Harvest Moon, Justine Joli, Kita St. Cyr, Medianoche, Nasty Canasta, Penny Wren, Mischief Molly, and Doc Wasabassco.

Advance tickets available HERE

Irony.

2012-03-01T13:28:00.002-05:00

New Video!
My most entirely classic act: "Black & Blue"

Tits for Tats!

2012-02-27T20:04:00.003-05:00

Tuesday Feb 28, 8-11pm
Wasabassco Burlesque presents
TITS FOR TATS
A Burlesque Benefit for Scarlet Sinclair

at Union Hall
702 Union St. (@ 5th Ave.), Brooklyn, NY

So often lately we find it necessary to help friends in need when hard times or tragedy strike - but for once, we're overjoyed to help someone fulfill a dream instead! On Tuesday, February 28th join Wasabassco for a special show to benefit tattoo artist, burlesque luminary and amazing friend Miss Scarlet Sinclair. Without Scarlet, there would be no Wasabassco; now our patron saint has the chance to travel abroad and study with world-famous illustrator Brian Froud, and we're determined to make that happen.

Scarlet's ink graces many of New York City's burlesque beauties, and for one night these ladies will show it off in support of the woman who has long been an inspiration to us all. Experience stunning striptease; view a 'living gallery' of gorgeous tattoo art; and win the chance to take home some burlesque souvenirs or a tattoo session of your very own! If you know and love Scarlet - or if you just love beautiful tattooed ladies getting naked for your entertainment - join us for this special edition of Wasabassco Burlesque at Union Hall.

Starring Darlinda Just Darlinda, Evelyn Vinyl, Hazel Honeysuckle, Kita St. Cyr, La Maia, Minnie Tonka, Nasty Canasta and more. Hosted by Doc Wasabassco.

Raffle prizes donated by Tattoo Ritual, Blue Streak Fancywear, GiGi LaFemme, Peekaboo Pointe, The Rhinestone Folles, The Shlepp Sisters, Wasabassco Burlesque and more.

Admission $10 TICKETS AVAILABLE HERE

History month continues!

2012-02-25T15:26:00.002-05:00

In August of 2006 at the Follies Fromages I earned the title of "Cheese Queen Of Coney Island" (which I still proudly hold to this day) with a cheese-themed act inspired by that beloved suburban childhood icon, Chuck E. Cheese.
On February 23rd of this year I retired the act with a final performance in celebration of the one-year anniversary of my very favorite Brooklyn bar, The Way Station.

Fortunately for those who missed it in the intervening six years, we caught that last performance on tape!

(This is actually the first time I've seen the whole performance on video ... and I have to admit, I creeped myself out a little. My crippling fear of robots and animatronics is well-documented; this act was always one part therapy and one part making up for hours of childhood terror!)

2012-02-24T13:29:00.004-05:00

As it's still my burlesque birthday month, here are a few more old shots from another long-retired act, "Banana Split," taken at RiFiFi early in 2006:

Photos by Lizzka

Now I Am Eight

2012-02-21T21:36:00.003-05:00

On February 20th I celebrated my 'burlesque birthday:' eight years performing and producing throughout New York City, across the country, and around the world. To which I have to say, "Holy crap, this is my job? How fucking cool is that?"

My first show back in 2004 was at Galapagos ArtSpace … located at the time in a glamorous former mayonnaise factory at the end of a mostly-deserted and entirely frozen-over block in still-semi-terrifying Williamsburg, Brooklyn. (In fact, it was backstage at that very first show that I met Veronika Sweet, "The Mafia Princess of Burlesque" - an incredible lady who eventually became my partner-in-crime-and-nudity for Sweet & Nasty Burlesque.)

A lot has changed since then, both with the 'scene' in NYC and with the art form itself and its place in the world. My own performance has changed drastically over the years: though some experiments have been far more successful than others, it has been a generally uphill journey. I'm proud of the work I have done, and truly excited at this point for the work that is to come.

There don't seem to be any pictures from that fateful evening in February of 2004 … which is probably for the best, given the tenuous grasp I had of the basic principles of stage makeup and burlesque costuming at the time. The oldest photos yielded up by the hard drive are from August, 2004 (and yes, they are pre-digital):

Photos by John Biavaschi (who, along with his lovely wife, came to almost every show)

Though I began performing with various shows here and there in NYC, from February through December of that first year my main experience continued to be at Galapagos: go-go on the bar from 1 to 3 am, every Friday night after the Floating Vaudeville show - frequently for an audience of up to four people. Gradually this became less go-go and more an extended, themed striptease (often to the DJ's confusion, but generally encouraged by the venue's booking manager, Willis).

At the time, the 'big' shows in NYC were weekends at The Slipper Room (where I saw my first show, a dream lineup featuring Julie Atlas Muz, Harvest Moon, and Lady Ace); Le Scandal; and the long-running Monday Night Burlesque at Galapagos. At one point, Willis complemented my performance after a go-go set, and I was emboldened to ask him when he was going to book me for Monday Night Burlesque.

"When you're good enough," he replied. "You're getting better, but I can't put you onstage with Amber Ray or World Famous BOB. Not yet."

To this day (and especially every time I get to share a stage with Amber or BOB), I am grateful to that man.

2012-02-15T18:06:00.008-05:00

A few shots by Canadian cutie Bettina May -
fabulous photographer, fantastic performer, lecturer in sexiness and pin-up queen!

2012-02-05T12:35:00.001-05:00

NAKED GIRLS READING presents
the VALENTINES' DAY HANGOVER

Wednesday, February 15th at 9:00 pm

It's February 15th: you awake once again to find yourself staring into the dull plastic eyes of yet another cheap pink teddy bear who promised last night to "wuv u 4-eva". In the cold hard light of day, after the saccharine high has worn off, it's easy to find yourself once again thinking, "What did Cupid do to me?" Well, the Naked Girls are here for you, with their Valentines' Day Hangover: in-the-buff readings of love and lust, without the hearts-and-flowers.

Host Nasty Canasta is joined by Velocity Chyaldd, Jenny C'est Quoi and Evelyn Vinyl, as the Naked Girls share stories of how love really is: silly and sexy, naughty and sublime.
It's the perfect treat for the Valentine who's still there once the chocolates and champagne are all gone.

at Under St. Marks - 94 St. Marks Place, NYC

Tickets: $20 | 2 for $35

Seating is limited - advance purchase recommended
CLICK HERE or call 212-868-4444

From the vault!

2012-02-02T08:54:00.002-05:00

New video!

"THE MOUSTACHE RIDE"
Filmed at Wasabassco's Moustache Show at the Way Station, 26 January 2012

Apocalypse Then

2012-02-01T12:51:00.012-05:00

From the archives: Dale Harris' photos of "Apocalypse Now," a long-retired act based on one of my favorite films of all time (which happens to be based on one of my favorite books of all time).
From 2006

The Moustache Show

2012-01-25T16:11:00.002-05:00

WASABASSCO at THE WAY STATION:
THE MOUSTACHE SHOW
Thursday, January 26th at 8:30 pm
at The Way Station - 683 Washington Avenue (bet Prospect & St. Marks), Brooklyn
$10 at the door

Mustachio'd maidens, lasses with lip-ticklers, and a showman with a splendid 'stache: Nasty Canasta is celebrating her birthday with a special moustache-themed burlesque show at the bar with the Tardis!

DOC WASABASSCO presents Burlesque at the Way Station, featuring: The Unknown Stripper; VICTORIA PRIVATES' classic mandance; a trip into the Mirror Universe with STORMY LEATHER; Lynchian lapdance from FRANNY FLUFFER; and the world premiere of a brand new act in celebration of NASTY CANASTA's self-proclaimed Year Of The Moustache.

And introducing the stage kitten debut of MISCHIEF MOLLY!

Doors at 8:30, Show at 9:00

Keep calm and carry on.

2012-01-19T17:12:00.007-05:00

A fabulous shot of my "Blitz" act, from the Sharkbite Sideshow at R-Bar on January 13, 2012:

Photo: Ely Kay

The act evokes British wartime cabaret, and features sound clips recorded on the street during the London Blitz. I find it an eerie yet oddly enjoyable act to perform (possibly because of the limited vision and muffled hearing from inside my gas mask ...)

Both the "Blitz" act and my newest tattoo were inspired by the British propaganda posters of WWII. The slogan "Keep Calm And Carry On" has resonated with me for years, and last December the amazing Scarlet Sinclair of Tattoo Ritual turned it into an incredible and unique design - one that incorporates some of the sideshow banner elements that she used for another piece for me several years ago.

If you ever find yourself in Farmingdale, NY, with an itch for new ink, make sure you stop by the shop!

2012-01-13T16:07:00.000-05:00

NAKED GIRLS READING presents

WESTERNS!

Wednesday, January 18th at 9:00 pm

Go west, Naked Girls! Ride the open range with your favorite readers-in-the-raw as they share tales both classic and contemporary of roping, riding, cow rustling and lonely nights under the wide-open starry skies - proving that a cowgirl's two best friends are her horse and her library card.

Host Nasty Canasta is joined by B.B. Heart, Gal Friday and Stormy Leather, as they share their favorite tales of how the West was won - plus, Naked Girls Reading NYC welcomes a very special guest: real-life cowboy and world-record holder Chris McDaniel will demonstrate the trick roping and bullwhipping skills that have won him championships around the world. Saddle up for Naked Girls Reading WESTERNS!

at Under St. Marks - 94 St. Marks Place, NYC

Tickets: $20 | 2 for $35

Seating is limited - advance purchase recommended
CLICK HERE or call 212-868-4444

Cyber-attack!

2012-01-10T18:41:00.005-05:00

New video!

"Cyberman" grinder girl act,
filmed at Wasabassco Burlesque at The Bell House on January 7th, 2011:

Photo: Linus Gelber

It's the dawn of a new era.

2012-01-06T14:21:00.003-05:00

2012: THE YEAR OF THE MOUSTACHE

Welcome to my own personal Year Of The Moustache, a 365-day celebration of the most amusing facial hair of all! Why moustaches? Because they make me giggle - especially the fake ones: I defy anyone to put on a fake 'stache and not smile!

This utterly informal project has already begun on Twitter: follow @nasty_canasta or search #mydailymoustache for a daily photo log of moustachery (and feel free to add your own).

And stay tuned for all the info on THE MOUSTACHE SHOW, as I celebrate my birthday at my favorite bar (The Way Station) with my favorite show (Wasabassco Burlesque) featuring some of my favorite performers (Stormy Leather, Franny Fluffer, Victoria Privates and Doc Wasabassco), all in bemoustached glory.

Happy Holidays!

2011-12-22T08:01:00.004-05:00

May this holiday season bring you everything you've ever dreamed of!

xoxo
Nasty

It's the most nakedest time of the year!

2011-12-02T10:09:00.001-05:00

NAKED GIRLS READING presents

A CHRISTMAS CAROL

Wednesday, December 21st at 9:00 pm

Naked Girls Reading stuffs your stocking with an extra-hot winter treat: their third annual reading of Charles Dickens' holiday classic A Christmas Carol! Nasty Canasta (declared by the New York Times to be "perhaps the loveliest and certainly the nudest Scrooge in history") leads an all-star cast of exhibitionists in an in-the-buff reading of this special version of A Christmas Carol, just as Dickens himself originally performed it - although perhaps a bit more naked.

Dickens himself invented so many of our most cherished Christmas traditions, and we're sure he'd want to be part of this newest one. We just know he'll be standing in spirit right at our ... elbows. Relax, raise a glass, and join Nasty Canasta, Legs Malone, Darlinda Just Darlinda and Franny Fluffer in a celebration of the true meaning of the holidays.

at Under St. Marks - 94 St. Marks Place, NYC

Tickets: $20 | 2 for $35

Seating is limited - advance purchase recommended
CLICK HERE or call 212-868-4444

Performer of the Month: The Interview

2011-12-01T13:53:00.003-05:00

Every month Wasabassco Burlesque spotlights one of our amazing performers with new photos, exclusive interviews and highlights. We ask each Performer Of The Month 15 questions and post their answers as updates throughout the month:

#7 NOVEMBER 2011: NASTY CANASTA

photo by Luke Ratray

1) How did you choose your name?
It's actually the name of a Chuck Jones cartoon character from the 1950's - he's a giant, surly Western outlaw with permanent five o'clock shadow and a whiskey habit. All in all fairly appropriate, I think.

2) What inspires you?
I'm a bit schizophrenic as far as inspiration and influences: I love random 70's tv theme songs, bad puns, and obscure science fiction. Sometimes an object on the street catches my eye, or a distracting noise outside ends up as the soundtrack for an act. Often I just get obsessed with the idea of being something totally stupid and completely non-sexy - a lamp, a sandwich, a marshmallow Peep - and I have to turn it into a striptease. It's burlesque OCD.

3) What makes you unique as a performer?
I have a particularly absurdist view of the world that tends to come out onstage (which is a polite way of saying that I'm kind of a wiseass). A lot of my acts deliberately play with elements of traditional burlesque in unexpected ways… also I'm generally not afraid of looking unladylike, which is wonderfully freeing.

4) Which of your acts is your current favorite?
My Cyberman grinder girl act! I just debuted it at the Wasabassco 7th Anniversary show - it went over even better than I hoped, and it was ridiculously fun to perform. The costume needs some welding repairs (we should all have problems like this … ) and I'm not sure when I'll get the chance to perform it next in a big enough space, but I can't wait to do it again. Usually my favorite acts are whichever ones I haven't gotten to do for a while, for whatever reason - too messy, too naked, too weird - so they don't get taken out often.

5) How did you first come to be associated with Wasabassco?
It was the artwork that did it! I saw the posters for the first Wasabassco show and I was like, here's these people doing a huge show full of incredible performers, and the art on the posters is fabulous. I contacted them and was booked to do a couple of acts in their second show. I'd only been performing for about a year and a half, and I'm still not sure why they decided to book me, but it seems to be working out okay ...

6) If you weren’t a burlesque performer, what else do you see yourself doing?
I left legit theater for burlesque about 7 years ago; I wouldn't go back to it now, but if I'd never found burlesque in the first place I'd probably still be doing horrible embarrassing off-off-off-Broadway experimental Shakespeare and temping in hospital offices on the Upper East Side and bursting into tears every morning the second the alarm went off. These days, though, if I ever decide to put my clothes back on for good I'll probably move full-time into costume design & sewing.

7) What’s the oddest audience you’ve performed for?
About six years ago I did a show in an all-ages club in suburban New Jersey. The audience was mostly 16-year-olds - boys and girls - and they were honestly for the most part pretty fabulous. Especially the girls.

8) What’s the most interesting thing you’ve learned about yourself by doing burlesque?
I've discovered a fearlessness that I didn't know I had. If it's well-crafted and justified artistically or comedically, I'll do pretty much anything onstage, regardless of how stupid I end up looking or how challenging the performance may be to an audience. I never tended to be that way in my offstage life - although happily I'm noticing it creeping in other places. Just like the glitter.

9) What’s your favorite style of underwear?

None? I'm not a big fan of underwear in Real Life … or onstage, for that matter. When I absolutely have to cover up, I usually do so in the most abbreviated manner possible.

10) How do you like to spend your day off?
In Brooklyn, in sneakers, and incognito. Days off mean days off-duty!

11) As a performer what one item can you not live without?
It's incredibly un-glamorous, but I would be lost without Ziploc baggies. Between packing & unpacking four or five times a week, keeping straight four different numbers at three different shows in the same night, and storing all this stuff in a NYC apartment in between, I'd be useless without the damn things. Sometimes I buy things just for the storage bags they come in. The upside of this is that I now I have a costume built out of a giant Ziploc bag … which gets folded up and stored in a slightly-smaller Ziploc bag. I suspect I have a problem.

12) What’s your least favorite part of doing burlesque?
It's probably a particular function of performing in NYC, but the schlepping gets tough: huge bags, no cars, lots of stairs and subways. Add in snow and 3am gigs and some days you feel like a very-overdressed pack mule.

13) Where would you like to perform that you’ve not yet had the chance?
The supper club at the Chelsea Hotel in Atlantic City (or really, anywhere on the boardwalk in AC: it's one of my favorite places in the world).

14) Do you have a favorite pair of shoes?
Probably a 3-way tie between the thigh-high leopard platform boots, the red patent ballet boots (which are surprisingly comfortable, I've discovered) and my good old battered black 6-inch stiletto stripper heels. (Actually, no, those are definitely my favorites. I bought my first pair in Vegas in 2006 and it took half a year to learn how to walk in them, and now they're like wearing sneakers. I've been through 6 pairs in 3 different colors; when I heard the company was closing down I stockpiled another 4. I don't know what I'm going to do when I wear through the last pair. Cry and learn cobblery, probably.)

15) What would people be surprised to know about you?
I'm terrified of robots. And I can sign my name with my butt.

Shop small - and sexy!

2011-11-28T13:11:00.002-05:00

Everyone knows that burlesque performers always look stunning; after all, it's our job! But fabulous finery like this doesn't come off-the-rack. Most performers handcraft incredible costumes for themselves and each other - so just where do we get the sparkly, feathery, fringe-y finery that makes our creations so fabulous and unique?

One of my favorite spots is B&Q Trim, a family-owned business in the heart of New York's Garment District. A longtime staple of dance and theatrical costumers, B&Q recently expanded to a second, even larger and more shiny wonderland full of everything you need to make your costume fantasies come alive.

Just a visit to their new showroom is enough to inspire: often I'll stop by for one specific item and end up creating an entire new piece based on an appliqué or feather pad that catches my eye. The owner, Peter, is always willing to help you choose just the right crystals or trim, and has an eye for color and style himself.

I also recommend B&Q for their accessories - boas, opera gloves - as well as their millinery and crafting supplies. Even if you're not looking to hit the stage, if you just feel the need for something a little shiny and fantastic to brighten up your winter wardrobe or sparkle up a handmade holiday gift, a quick visit is pretty much guaranteed to inspire.

B&Q TRIM
Open Mon-Sat 10:00 am - 6:30 pm
102 W. 38th St. (bet 6th Ave & Bway), NYC
212-869-6889
bqtrim[at]gmail.com
www.shinetrim.com

2011-11-21T09:09:00.003-05:00

A sneak peek at the last meeting of The Hellfire Club, by the fabulous Luma Rouge:

Nasty Canasta, The Sicilian Siren with the Educated Ass!

This weekend's amazing events!

2011-11-16T08:24:00.005-05:00

Wednesday, November 16 at 9:00pm
Naked Girls Reading presents PIRATES vs NINJAS

The Naked Girls pay tribute to one of history's greatest rivalries! Revel in swashbuckling adventures and silent assassinations, tales of buried treasure and honor avenged, ribald sea shanties, poetical odes on throwing stars, and much much more. Nasty Canasta is joined by Hazel Honeysuckle, Madame Rosebud & Bambi the Mermaid, as they share their favorite tales of subtle spies and seafaring brigands.

at Under St. Marks: 94 St. Marks Place,NYC

Tickets: $20 | 2 for $35
Seating is limited - advance purchase recommended CLICK HERE or call 212-868-4444

•••••

Thursday, November 17 at 10:15 pm

The Wasabassco Hellfire Club

The Dark & Dirty Side of Wasabassco ... an intimate experience for those who dare. Featuring Nasty Canasta, Stormy Leather, Dame Cuchifrita, Deity Delgado, Peekaboo Pointe, Victoria Privates and Amanda Whip.

at The Red Room: 85 East 4th Street, NYC
Entry with key only - $40 via ticket purchase | Seating limited to 30 Advance tickets (recommended) available HERE

•••••

Friday, November 18 at 11:30 pm

Doc Wasabassco's Burlesque at City Winery

An elegant night out with the best burlesque performers in the world on a big stage in a beautiful venue! Starring Wasabassco Performer of The Month Nasty Canasta, plus Amber Ray, Miss Cherry Delight, Gal Friday, Natasha King, Peekaboo Pointe, Penny Wren, Sapphire Jones, special guest Justine Joli, Doc Wasabassco and more.

at City Winery: 155 Varick Street, NYC
$15 admission | Advance tickets available HERE

•••••

Sat Nov 19 at 11 pm

Wasabassco at Union Hall

Hosted by Sapphire Jones, with Evelyn Vinyl, Jenny C'est Quoi, Justine Joli, Nasty Canasta, and out sexy stage kitten Dottie Dynamo.

at Union Hall: 702 Union Street, Park Slope, Brooklyn
Admission: $12 | Advance tickets recommended

Two nights of pure poetry.

2011-11-14T17:37:00.007-05:00

Some fantastic photos by Melody Mudd, plus a lovely wrap-up of the 2-day Wasabassco Burlesque 7th Anniversary Extravaganza, courtesy of J.D. Oxblood at BurlesqueBeat.com!

Friday night:

" ... For the third act, Nasty Canasta hosted as a pirate unicorn. I don’t know what’s wrong with her but I love it. Yep—pirate eyepatch, unicorn horn, lovely tail matching her mane, and not much else ... AND she read poems to introduce all of the acts, some doggerel, one haiku, and a lovely sonnet to bring out the night’s closer, and a particular coup for Doc as a producer: from Chicago, the Evil Stepmother of Burlesque, Michelle L’Amour!" *

Saturday night:

"Friday night’s show was great, but it was Saturday when I was truly washed over by emotion. To be fair, it had kinda started back on Wednesday, sitting at Affaire in the East Village over cocktails and goat cheese fries, chitchatting with friends and waiting for Evelyn Vinyl to take her clothes off. What am I on about? Well, if you were there on Saturday, you heard Nasty Canasta explain where her tattoo—by Scarlet Sinclair—came from, though it may not have moved you the way it did me. I’ll come back to this ...

... The Kobe-beefilicious Kobayashi Maru was in some metal man mask—I’m sure I’m missing a nerd reference here, but I don’t care—overalls, silver gloves and Union Jack Docs, and managed to command the attention of every eye in the house by stopping still. And barely twitching. Nixing the overalls, she revealed a metal corset; a stagehand gave her a grinder and she took it to herself with relish, sending broad roostertails of sparks up into the grid, sparks flying close enough to the foot of the stage that we could feel the heat. Someone near me was asking, “How does she do that? Is that a trick?” Um, no, darling, that shit’s real, and it’s really, really cool. The whole mob is screaming ...

The night’s grand finale was a twisted bath act, courtesy of, who else: Nasty Canasta, to Mel Torme’s cover of Donovan’s “Sunshine Superman,” climbs into a jumbo-sized Greek diner coffee cup, sponges herself off with the “creamer” and dumps sugar—confetti that sticks to her. Needless to say, at this point in the evening, my notes had deteriorated past legibility.

But backing up a bit ... Earlier in the evening, Nasty had explained where her tattoo came from, which reads “Admission to the smoking ruins, 10 cents,” and how it had become a kind of mantra for her. And I couldn’t stop thinking about this idea, that even disaster could be profitable, that striving to fail is the only way to succeed, and how the very identity of “J.D. Oxblood” was built on the smoking ruins of a charred novelist, a ruined playwright, a burnt-out actor—whatever, that guy was “just some dude” ... These days, I’m bandying around a third name just to get to those smoking ruins more expeditiously—and if anyone’s with me on needing another name to encompass all that she is, it’s Nasty Canasta. But as Doc was saying about your “real” name—“don’t ever tell me!”—that’s what almost made me cry, because that’s what burlesque has become to me: a place where you are whoever you say you are, and fuck the punters. I don’t care what you did before you came here, just show me something good. And if you go down in flames, make something out of THAT, and come back tomorrow night!"

(Madame Rosebud, preshow)

* A haiku:
A Northern wasteland,
Boston sends us perfection:
Vikki Likkerish.

A limerick:
There once was a big burlesque show
With not enough vaudeville, and so
They got someone - why,
He worked for pie! -
A magician named Nelson Lugo.

A bit of doggerel:
Bettina may, bettina might -
If the crowd is loud and the mood is right.
What Bettina would, I cannot say,
But Bettina might, Bettina May.

An acrostic:
N is for the naughty thoughts,
I for indecent dreams.
K is for the kinky ideas she inspires daily, it seems.
K, because she could kick your ass - a threat that's not in vain,
And I is for the incredible rack of Nikki Le Villain.

And, finally, a sonnet:
A fruit of perfect summertime
When freshly washed with dew,
Though sweet, is not half so sublime
As the perfect peach on you.

The heavenly orb that nightly glows
In the velvet sky above
Is beautiful, though Heaven knows,
Your moon is better, o love.

The finest detective may solve the crime
By discovering that which is true;
But I would rather, every time,
Get to the bottom of you:

For no behind is as stunning as your
"Ass That Goes POW," Michelle L'amour.

Rocketships & Blowjobs

2011-11-10T16:17:00.002-05:00

(Earlier this year we debuted Night Out, a live variety show featuring some of my favorite burlesque and variety performers in a non-naked context. The show will hopefully return someday in a slightly different format; in the meantime, I wanted to share the inaugural episode of "Rocketships & Blowjobs," a relatively self-explanatory segment I created for the show: )

•••••

I think I know what you’re thinking: Reality show? 1980’s fake rock band? How-to lecture?

Don’t be silly. I don’t know how to build a rocketship.

Don’t let’s get hung up on the specifics. What this is, is two minutes of enthusiasm. It could be about anything – I just chose these particular things because, like any other 14-year-old boy, I am enthusiastic about them both. I’m curious. They make me giggle. I don’t really know how either of them work, but I like to read stories about them. And sometimes make up my own.

There is a lost art to enthusiasm, at least around these parts. Maybe it’s because we don’t have things like Old Glory sweatshirts and Christian dance teams and V8-hemis and 3-for-1 specials on bologna and on the package it’s spelled B-A-L-O-N-E-Y – the things that we’re supposed to get excited about. Instead we revel in our passionate discontent and firm grasp on irony.

And it’s okay, it’s good – I like irony, it fuels us, it drives us, it keeps the messenger bag industry going and it’s responsible for some fabulous facial hair. But irony is the enemy of enthusiasm. And without enthusiasm we’re just a bunch of douchebags in 45-dollar Pong t-shirts. And I, for one, never intended to live that way.

So I’m calling for a return to excitement, to genuine exuberance and unashamed interest in things. Don’t get me wrong – I don’t trust anybody who smiles all the time, either. That shit is weird. Maybe it’s the chemicals in the Gowanus or some high-pitched noise that the MTA pipes into the G-train, but we’ve evolved beyond the ability to maintain constant pleasant equilibrium; it’s a survival mechanism. We need it. But without enthusiasm, what are we surviving for?

Try it – just for a few minutes every day – just get excited about something. It doesn’t have to be something big or important, I mean – the birth of your second child, well, duh. But – look up a picture of a hamster on the internet; spell ‘colour’ and ‘behaviour’ with a U because you want to; when you’re making breakfast take a minute to appreciate that it starts out as bread but it ends up as toast and that’s pretty cool.

And don’t let’s let irony keep us from liking stuff, honestly liking it. That Milkshake song, Japanese porn, Ishtar – have you seen Ishtar? It’s not a good movie, it needs a lot of editing, but the funny parts – they make me laugh.

It’s okay to like stuff. And it’s okay to talk about the stupid stuff you like. Tell somebody, tonight, something that you like. I like a lot of stuff. I like rocketships and I like blowjobs and you might not, but that’s okay, cuz you like other stuff, and I do too.

See? It’s okay to like stuff. And it’s okay to talk about it. That’s what we’re here for. Because it feels good.

BurlesqueBeat.com on "Wasablanca"

2011-11-01T09:09:00.005-04:00

“Wasablanca” at the Bell House, Brooklyn

By J.D. Oxblood for BurlesqueBeat.com

Friday, August 5th 2011

The Bell House, Brooklyn

I really should start reading press releases more carefully—or maybe not. At the multiple-conspirator event Wasablanca, I was pleasantly surprised. It wasn’t what I was expecting—and that’s a rare sentence to formulate these days. Wit’s End, Wasabassco Burlesque, Nasty Canasta, Gemini & Scorpio and the Bell House all ganged together to give us an evening that was three parts live music, one part burlesque, one part Casablanca revisited ala Nasty Canasta’s twisted Brooklyn talent, and one part modern speakeasy culture.

The driving force of the eve was most certainly the impeccable live jazz standards of Gelber and Manning, who systematically covered every song used in the film Casablanca. Clearly, much of the crowd had come to see G&M—not for the first time-and swayed gently to the music for the duration of the evening, a few even cutting a Lindy. I didn’t see any dance lessons on offer, but the Bell House had never been more loungy. G&M lead a tight band—their trumpet player is a master of the tasty lick, and covers a wide range of sonic flavors by swapping out his mutes, from a straight mute to a Dixie hat to a plunger, coloring the room in different shades of smooth. As for Manning, not only does she sing like a bird—a bird with the timbre of an early swing warbler—or like Katharine Whalen of the Squirrel Nut Zippers, if you don’t follow—but she’s also just so cute you kinda wanna slap her. NOT that I’m an advocate of slapping people, it’s just… well, when I said this to Melody Mudd, she said, “J.D., must you go there? Not everyone is in touch with their dark side.” Well, my dark side is driving. Point being, Manning is super cute, and super duper

animated—she’s a dream to watch perform. So much that the evening was a tad occluded by her tendency to stand directly behind a WPA-era saucer mike, eclipsing her face from our vantage point below her. Profile, darling, profile—or lower the mike! Regardless, Manning is a pint-sized stunner with nice stems, and was working a simple dress and cute shoes. All the ladies in the house were swaying, waiting for some guy to spin them—this scene needed a designated dance floor, which, barring linoleum, could have been accomplished with some lighting in the house.

The SHOW part of the show was the latest play from Nasty Canasta, which opened hilariously with Nasty as Ric—natch—and Matt Holtzclaw in the Peter Lorre role. Thank god he didn’t try to do the voice. After introducing Captain Friday—Gal Friday—we got a peek of burlesque, with Gal working the backwards ass-walk, a single nipple tassle twirl, a glitter glove that landed on the trumpet player, and her signature hand-slap to the thighs, and affixing a badge to her G-string. Our next chapter featured GoGo Harder and Hazel Honeysuckle as Laszlo and Ilsa—and Hazel does a simple strip to an insanely tight nude corset.

Possibly the cleverest bit was Nasty Canasta simply drinking herself into oblivion to “As Time Goes By,” sitting in a chair fighting with her sock garters in a lovely bra and panties—decorated like black filigree—and slugging off a gin bottle, getting drunk as hell and physically riffing. She gets down to pasties that are simple black discs, yet mimes a twirl with no tassel as the band plays on. Hilarious.

And then you have the sheer ridiculosity of the casting—not that I mean typecasting, but seriously—of Madame Rosebud, Marlo Marquise, and Stormy Leather as the Nazis, all decked out in very little black leather and Wendy O. Williams X’s over O’s. Which got us a coda ending—post “Hill of Beans” speech—of Marlo spanking Gal with a leather glove.

Ah, for a classic story of sacrifice and loss… we never felt like we’d lost our evening.

Kiss kiss,

JDX

Photo: Melody Mudd

New security video released!

2011-10-27T19:22:00.003-04:00

We suspect the reason Kobayashi Maru hasn't been around lately is that she's been undergoing certain "upgrades" ... you'll have to come to Saturday night of
the Wasabassco 7th Anniversary Extravaganza to find out the truth ...

Let us make something fabulous for you!

2011-10-26T13:37:00.021-04:00

Not only do I have the best job in the world, I have two of the best jobs in the world: when I'm not taking it off in front of an audience, I get to create those fabulous costumes I (and lots of other amazing performers!) wear.
It's a little concern we've named Blue Streak Fancywear:
Custom burlesque design for Sapphire Jones.

Blue Streak Fancywear is the purveyor of bespoke clothing and accessories for burlesque performers, ecdysiastical enthusiasts, and anyone who simply wants to dress up a bit.

Calamity Chang in a made-to-order gown.

Handmade to order, Blue Streak creations include gowns, corsets, costume recreations, custom-designed and -embellished shoes and accessories, period dress and uniforms, unique knitwear, and specialty menswear.

Precious Little as Harley Quinn

Even if you don't plan to 'take it all off,' we can help you look fabulous the moment you put it all on! For design and costuming inquiries, email us at BlueStreakFancywear[at]gmail.com

Showman Doc Wasabassco in an exclusive Blue Streak design.

Our unique pasties are available at most Wasbassco Burlesque shows - including the upcoming 7th Anniversary Extravaganza, where over 100 new designs will be available for purchase!